With “Legion” pitting man against angel at the megaplex this weekend, I just had to build an MSN movie gallery about other theological thrillers.

… and dammit, I just realized I forgot “Stigmata”. But in my defense, I bet you did, too.

You’ve got to love the thinking here. Sony staked out this weekend for its supernatural thriller “Legion” months ago … so what do the distributors of “Creation” do? They pick the very same weekend to release their movie, presumably in the hopes that all those posters of a shirtless, winged Paul Bettany (holding a machine gun, no less) will somehow draw audiences to their tepid little period piece, which stars Bettany as Charles Darwin.

Yes! Spillover effect for the win! You know, assuming they don’t bother to look at the posters or something. And really, does anyone actually say “Two for the Paul Bettany movie” when they step up to the ticket window?

So. Diving in, then:

“Creation”: The stunt casting of actual couple Paul Bettany and Jennifer Connelly as Charles and Emma Darwin is supposed to add some chemistry to the dramatization of the origin of “On the Origin of Species”. It doesn’t, but it’s not really the actors’ fault; Jon Amiel just doesn’t seem interested in investing his plodding prestige drama with any life. Kieran agrees — though Susan liked it a little more than either of us.

“Extraordinary Measures“: You know how sometimes a movie will take a true story and oversimplify it to the point of pandering stupidity because it doesn’t have any faith in an audience’s ability to follow a complex story? This is one of those movies — and worse, it’s further hampered by Harrison Ford’s laughable performance as a maverick research scientist who is entirely fictional. Because Brendan Fraser’s turn as a father trying to save his kids’ lives wasn’t compelling enough, apparently.

“The Last Station“: Christopher Plummer surprised me in “The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus” by pulling out a terrific, understated performance — which the film tried its best to ignore, but that’s a different problem. Here, he’s back to hamming it up as Leo Tolstoy in Michael Hoffman’s pokey costume drama, which features additional hamming from Helen Mirren and Paul Giamatti while James McAvoy looks on and tries to keep his dignity.

“Legion“: When angels declare war on humanity, Paul Bettany and his divine abs may be the only thing standing between us and annihilation. Oh, and Dennis Quaid is involved somehow, too. There was no press screening, so I’ll be discovering how closely this hews to the plot of “The Prophecy” right along with everyone else. UPDATE: Turns out it’s more of a “Terminator” riff. Huh.

“Petropolis: Aerial Perspectives on the Alberta Tar Sands“: Peter Mettler’s environmental documentary delivers exactly what it promises — a series of hypnotic aerial shots of massive ecological devastation, taken from heights that make them appear almost beautiful. Only 43 minutes long, so the Royal has arranged Q&As after each screening; Mettler himself will be in attendance tonight and tomorrow, and Marc Glassman — film critic and editor of POV Magazine –will be there Sunday evening.

“Revanche”: I’ve been waiting more than a year for someone to open Gotz Spielmann’s intricate, noir-tinged drama about a cop and a crook who share a common wound; this weekend, it gets a limited engagement at the Bloor that’s basically a teaser for next month’s Criterion DVD release. It’s not ideal, but it’ll have to do.

“The Tooth Fairy”: Look, I don’t begrudge Dwayne Johnson making family comedies. He’s got that larger-than-life presence that makes him perfect for concepts like this. (And Stephen Merchant is in it, too.) But … it just looks horrible, you know? And it’s opening in mid-January. So I shall do the noble thing, and wait for the DVD.

Oh, and if you need something else to see this weekend, check out Cinematheque’s Best of the Decade program. It’s all Jia Zhang-ke, all the time, with the director introducing “Platform” tonight and “Still Life” and “The World” playing on Saturday. And give the box-office people my best.

The latest issue of NOW is on the stands, but if you don’t feel like going outside today, you can find my interviews with Jia Zhang-ke, Brendan Fraser and James McAvoy right here on the internet! Isn’t that wonderful?

(Fraser and McAvoy have movies coming out, but Jia’s coming into town this weekend to introduce three of his films that made it onto TIFF Cinematheque’s Best of the Decade list. I wrote about that here — though I somehow missed seeing “Yi Yi” on their list, which means that six of my own choices for the decade’s best are represented, rather than five.)

Oh, and I also spoke to Martha Burns and Sonya Di Rienzo about their new project, “Little Films About Big Moments”, airing this weekend on HBO Canada. That conversation was actually conducted in person, which made for a nice change. There was soup!

Hey, everybody, it’s National Popcorn Day!

… well, maybe. Julie Nesrallah declared it as such this morning on CBC’s “Tempo”, claiming she’d read it on the internet and that meant it had to be true. But the Google reveals that even the official Popcorn Board isn’t sure when we’re supposed to celebrate that greatest of all snack foods:

Various sources report it as January 19; others claim it takes place on whatever day the Super Bowl falls on.

Of course, if something as prestigious and trustworthy as the Popcorn Board –“a non-profit check-off organization funded by U.S. popcorn processors to raise awareness of popcorn as a versatile, whole-grain snack… formed in April 1998 as an Act of Congress at the request of the popcorn processing industry” — can’t be sure about the schedule of its own holiday, how can we believe in anything?

Better safe than sorry. Weather permitting, I’ll head over to the Royal this evening and pick up a bag. They’ll probably appreciate the business; “Police, Adjective” may be a great movie, but I can’t imagine it’s a big concession booster.

Remember how the Golden Globes managed to be surprising and thrilling for a few minutes last year, when “Slumdog Millionaire” grabbed all the major prizes and vaulted from dark horse to Oscar favourite?

Yeah, that was last year. This year’s Globes were all about the blue people. As James Cameron’s “Avatar” continues its phenomenal box-office run — it’s now grossed $491 million in the U.S. alone — the HFPA rolled over and let James Cameron scratch its collective belly, offering trophies for Best Picture (Drama) and Best Director. (At least the song didn’t win.)

Other awards went more or less as expected. Jeff Bridges and Meryl Streep won acting prizes for drama (“Crazy Heart”) and comedy (“Julie & Julia”), while Robert Downey Jr. and Sandra Bullock mirrored them in the opposite categories for “Sherlock Holmes” and “The Blind Side”. Christoph Waltz and Mo’Nique took the supporting prizes, “The Hangover” was crowned Best Comedy or Musical, “The White Ribbon” won the foreign-language award and “Up” walked off with Animated Feature. You can see the whole list here.

Shut out entirely were “The Hurt Locker” and “(500) Days of Summer”, which doesn’t appear to bode well for their Oscar chances. Of course, that’s only if you believe the HFPA is a reliable predictor of Academy taste, rather than a freakshow collective of vaguely disreputable media hangers-on that have somehow transformed themselves into tastemakers.

It’s all about perspective, really.

With the Golden Globes tomorrow night and “Crazy Heart” opening yesterday, it seems like the right time for an MSN Movies gallery about actors who’ve played musicians, and how those performances did or didn’t work as Oscar bids.

Some clarification here, re. the whole “Crazy Heart” thing: I think Jeff Bridges is a lovely man, and I don’t blame him one bit for the incessant awards buzz around his very good performance in a fairly generic film.

I honestly believe he doesn’t give a crap whether he wins or not, or even whether he gets nominated; it seems to be a management thing that’s taken on a momentum of its own as the film has opened.

So if you’re wondering whether to see the movie, read my review and make an informed choice, by all means, but don’t confuse the packaging with the content.

And light a candle for the late, great Dewey Cox, who never got half the respect he deserved as an artist. Damn shame, that was.

After a couple of relatively quiet weeks, the movies are rolling out again — big-budget studio efforts, and so many awards contenders you’d think there was a major ceremony happening this weekend, instead of the Golden Globes. Here we go, diving in …

“The Book of Eli“: Thirty years after the end of the world, along comes Denzel Washington as an ass-kicking holy warrior dedicated to protecting a certain rare tome from anyone who might abuse it — like, say, local tyrant Gary Oldman. The Hughes Brothers’ apocalypse actioner may border on the silly, but it’s considerably more cinematic and engaged than, say, “The Road”.

“Crazy Heart“: If you follow the awards chatter, you’ve probably heard quite a lot about Jeff Bridges’ performance as a broken-down, alcoholic country star. He’s pretty great — and so is Maggie Gyllenhaal, as the much younger woman who tempts him to settle down — but the performances are locked in a pretty generic movie. So take that under advisement.

“High Life”: Gary Yates, director of “Seven Times Lucky”, returns with another tonally wobbly tale of small-time crooks looking for that one big score — this time, it’s a bunch of hapless junkies scheming to rob an ATM. (Curiously, that’s the exact same plot as the “Trailer Park Boys” sequel.) Timothy Olyphant is charismatic as ever as the ringleader, but the story never quite gels. Glenn feels much the same way.

“The Lovely Bones“: Peter Jackson takes on Alice Sebold’s delicate novel about life, death and the in-between, and loses his ever-lovin’ mind: Apparently, when you’re raped and murdered by a monstrous neighbor, you get to go to Narnia. The most misguided film I’ve seen in a very long time, a disaster of good intentions and terrible choices; it’s a profoundly depressing experience, and not because of the subject matter. It’s a corrective for people who thought “King Kong” was self-indulgent.

“The Memsahib”: Cultures clash and love endures in writer-director-editor Kruti Majmudar’s attempt to ride that “Slumdog Millionaire” juggernaut. I haven’t seen it, but Susan loathed it, and that’s good enough for me.

“Police, Adjective“: Corneliu Porumboiu’s remarkable Romanian policier doesn’t contain a single violent act — or even an aggressive gesture — but still plays like a nail-biting thriller, as a good man tries to find a way to do the right thing within a system that’s long since lost sight of what the right thing might be. Simple, terrific stuff.

“The Spy Next Door”: Wow, Jackie Chan got old. Can he even move his face any more? Rad watches so you don’t have to.

“The White Ribbon“: Michael Haneke considers the gestation of German fascism in the form of a stern lecture about the persistent rot that runs beneath polite society — and presents this thesis with his traditional suffocating self-importance. For this, he gets the Palme d’Or and a shot at an Oscar, and somehow I’m left feeling responsible.

And that’s the week. You know “Avatar” will crush everything in its path again, but it’s nice to have choices.

The latest issue of NOW features my interview with Allen and Albert Hughes, whose post-apocalyptic action movie “The Book of Eli” opens tomorrow.

It’s nice to see them back in the game; it’s been nine years since their last feature, and I always enjoy watching them work, even when a given movie doesn’t quite catch fire. **hack cough “From Hell” snort hack**

Something that didn’t make it into the piece: I asked Albert if we’re ever likely to see a decent home-video release of “Dead Presidents”. The brothers just supervised a new Blu-ray edition of “Menace II Society”, so I was hoping there’d be news of similar treatment for their follow-up. (Disney released the DVD back in the early days of 4:3 widescreen masters, and it’s sorely in need of an upgrade.)

Nothing’s coming, he said. And he’s not too keen on revisiting the film: “It’s like looking at a picture of yourself in high school with pimples.”

Balls, I say. Come on, Disney! Bring on the 1080p/24 HD release! Hell, just imagine watching N’Bushe Wright’s face slip into darkness with no black crush. I’d buy it in a heartbeat.

“The Book of Eli” will look pretty good on Blu-ray, too. But you might want to catch it on the big screen.