There Are No Winners Here

And yet, I suspect this will not help my careerWell, that’s just sad: Variety reports that “Meet the Spartans” beat “Rambo” at the North American box office this weekend, with the crappy collection of pop-culture references edging out the creepy fetishistic bloodbath by just $500,000.

Interestingly, “Spartans” grossed $18.7 million; “Rambo” made $18.2 million; not exactly impressive when you consider “Cloverfield” grossed $46.1 million just last week, but then that was a January record — and, almost certainly, the result of months of carefully stoked marketing.

(Side note on “Cloverfield”: Its repetition of the “Blair Witch Project” phenomenon appears to extend all the way to the backlash: “Cloverfield” dropped 68% in its second weekend, coming in at number four with just $12.7 million.)

I was going to say something pithy about wondering how many of the people who paid to see either “Meet the Spartans” or “Rambo” feel they got their money’s worth, as opposed to all the “Cloverfield” haters … but then I realized the answer would probably make me cry.