Welcome to Avatar Day, people. You’ve seen the TV spots, you’ve read the stories; this is the movie that changes everything forever. Except that it won’t. Because, ultimately, it’s just one of several movies opening this week, each with its own special place in the megaplex …
“Avatar“: Twelve years after “Titanic”, James Cameron returns to Great Big Event Movie Filmmaking with … a massive sci-fi version of “Dances with Wolves”. It’s kind of silly, metaphorically muddled and awfully long — except in the last 45 minutes, when everything comes together with such pure movie power that you’ll forget why you ever doubted his talent. And then the robot man pulls out a big knife, and you remember, but you go with it anyway.
“Big River Man”: Unchecked megalomania has never seemed quite so endearing as it does in John Maringouin’s ramshackle documentary about Slovenian swimmer Martin Strel, who plans to swim the length of Amazon in order to raise awareness about deforestation, but also because he’s sort of nuts. Rad explains.
“Broken Embraces”: Now that he’s been declared a master filmmaker, Pedro Almodovar can recycle his own scripts without fear of being called out; why develop new ideas when you can just staple chunks of “Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown” into the body of “Bad Education”? Not that the result — a moody, time-shifting melodrama — is a disappointment, exactly; indeed, it’s perfectly serviceable. But I thought we were supposed to expect more from master filmmakers than cromulence. Susan and Jason were similarly let down.
“Did You Hear About the Morgans?“: In which we finally discover just how bad a Sandra Bullock romantic comedy has to be for Sandra Bullock to pass on it. Hugh Grant looks miserable even before he sprays himself in the face with bear repellent, and Sarah Jessica Parker looks distressingly like a live-action Gollum. Just plain awful, on every level.
“The Young Victoria“: Jean-Marc Vallee’s period romance may come wrapped in the gaudy Oscar-baiting opulence perfected by Miramax back in the “Shakespeare in Love” era, but you know what they say about books and covers. Having gone back for a second look, I found it s a deeper and more affecting look at power and maturation than I first gave it credit for, built around finely honed performances by Emily Blunt and Rupert Friend as the untested queen and her supportive consort. Do give it a look.
And that’s everything for today. Which is good, because this week was flat-out insane. Don’t believe me? Check out my rather breathless appearance on CTV News Channel yesterday afternoon, arranged less than an hour beforehand … and nearly aborted when I got to the studio “just in time” to discover my watch was running about five minutes slow.
Good times, good times.