Poor Justin Bieber. Not only did he have to suffer the indignity of losing at the Grammys last night, but he had to watch in what I imagine was good-natured incomprehension — you know, like a cocker spaniel — as his concert movie, “Never Say Never” was edged out at the box-office by the abominable Adam Sandler comedy “Just Go with It”.

Yup. Sandler’s audiences ignored the scathing reviews (and the Twitter hashtag) to push the lazy remake of “Cactus Flower” to the top with a $31 million gross — enough to squeak past “Never Say Never”, which earned $30.3 million. I’ll forego the usual finger-wagging this week; really, if you saw “Just Go with It”, you’ve suffered enough.

The ultimate irony? If Bieber’s fans hadn’t stayed home Sunday night to catch their idol on the Grammys and gone to see his movie instead, “Never Say Never” might have come out on top.

Then again, it was a school night.

… because after a few relatively peaceful weeks, there’s an absolute glut of movies opening today. Shall we just dive in?

“Biutiful”: Never fear, cinephiles — Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu’s first film since ending his creative partnership with screenwriter Guillermo Arriaga is every bit as oppressively miserable as “21 Grams” and “Babel”, with Javier Bardem suffering manfully as a dying psychic trying to secure his family’s fortunes before he makes his own journey to the other side. Susan loved it; me, not so much.

“Cedar Rapids“: It makes sense to cast Ed Helms as a small-town innocent thrust into the chaos of the (relatively) big city, but you have to give the guy something to do, and Miguel Arteta’s cramped farce mostly waits for him and his co-stars to come up with funny line readings. Anne Heche finds a couple, but Isiah Whitlock, Jr. gets the only real belly laughs in the picture. Clay Davis for the win, y’all!

“The Eagle”: Channing Tatum and Jamie Bell butch up big-time for Kevin Macdonald’s Roman Legion epic, which seems to want to outdo “300” for sweaty pecs and hip-hugging battle skirts. Glenn and Jason were equally unimpressed.

“From Prada to Nada”: “Sense and Sensibility” gets yet another updating, with Camilla Belle and Alexa Vega as Beverly Hills sisters whose misfortune sends them to live in the barrios of East L.A. (And you thought the Duffs of Manhattan had it rough in “Material Girls”.) Susan was unimpressed.

“Gnomeo and Juliet“: You know, as CG animated comedies about garden gnomes that come to life to re-enact Shakespare go, this is sort of okay … though I’m not entirely sure why it needed to be set to Disneyfied arrangements of Elton John’s greatest hits. Perhaps the answer’s in the question.

“Grace, Milly, Lucy … Child Soldiers”: Raymonde Provencher’s documentary addresses the issue of Ugandan girls conscripted into the Lord’s Resistance Army; as Glenn points out in his review, most coverage of the matter focuses on boys. But the experiences of the girls are worse, as you’ll see …

“Kuroneko“: Kaneto Shindo made this subtle ghost story as a follow-up to “Onibaba”, but it didn’t enjoy anywhere near the international acclaim and was lost to obscurity. Now, in advance of the inevitable Criterion DVD, it’s getting a limited theatrical run at the Bloor. And remember, the bigger the screen, the bigger the impact …

“Just Go with It“: Having previously remade “Mr. Deeds Goes to Town” and “The Longest Yard”, Adam Sandler takes on “Cactus Flower”. Yes, really. I’m catching it this afternoon; I’ll link to my review as soon as it’s live. UPDATE: Well, that was a horrific experience.

“Justin Bieber: Never Say Never”: Why make a Justin Bieber concert movie in 3D? Because there’s no money like tween money. Rad says it’s better than the Disney films with Miley Montana and the Jonas Brothers, so I guess that’s something.

“Modra“: A lot of directors make coming-of-age movies, but very few of them really understand the emotional alchemy of the genre; Ingrid Veninger does, and that’s what makes her work so intimate and moving. If you’re planning to see a movie this weekend, think seriously about this one. It’s really quite lovely.

“Unauthorized: The Harvey Weinstein Project”: I was actually supposed to review this, but circumstances led to me becoming a last-minute editorial consultant to director Barry Avrich, and I had to recuse myself. Susan ended up covering it for us, and was not terribly impressed.

And that’s everything. Whew. Now to sit by the phone and wait for an interview — which I’d be happy to tell you about, but then men in hats and coats would come and do things to our brains …

I like Ingrid Veninger. I’m probably not supposed to say stuff like that, being all professional and everything, but that’s just how it is. I’ve really enjoyed her movies, “Only” and “Modra” (which opens tomorrow), and because Toronto is a pretty small town, all things considered, we’ve ended up at a few of the same functions. (We were both on the features panel for Canada’s Top Ten in 2009, though we didn’t know it at the time.) You should see her movies. They’re quite good.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, we had a long conversation about filmmaking, and the results were compressed into an interview in this week’s NOW. The online version of said interview is actually twice as long as the one in the paper — so go to it!

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a movie with hot girls stalking each other will win the weekend box-office. (And if it isn’t, it ought to be.)

“The Roommate” grossed $15.6 million to take the top spot at the megaplex, despite pulling some fairly skank–tastic reviews. “Sanctum” placed a distant second, even with the enhanced ticket prices of its IMAX 3D engagements, with $9.2 million, while “No Strings Attached” and “The King’s Speech” were jockeying for third with $8.4 million and $8.3 million, respectively. (Final figures will be released today.)

Did you see anything? I can’t imagine you did. This has been a pretty thin season, even once we adjust for how crappy studio pictures usually are between January and March. I do hold out some hope for “Unknown”, though. That looks like it could be fun.

Okay, things aren’t that bleak this weekend– sure, the studio stuff may tend toward the generic this time of year, but there’s some decent activity on the indie front. Well, half-decent, anyway.

“BirdWatchers“: I’m not sure how to describe Marco Bechis’ film about the indigenous Guarani people of Brazil. It’s sort of a public-awareness drama, designed to bring the world’s attention to their status as second-class citizens in their own country, but at the same time it acknowledges the self-destructive behaviour that makes the Guarani complicit in their plight. So let’s call it “provocative”, then.

“Oliver Sherman“: Presumably through the goodness of their hearts, three actors I really like — Donal Logue, Garrett Hedlund and Molly Parker — find themselves trapped in Ryan Redford’s paper-thin domestic drama about survivor guilt and PTSD, or something. One of the weakest Canadian films I saw at TIFF last year, and that’s really saying something.

“The Roommate”: It’s been 19 years since “Single White Female” — why not turn that sucker around for the new generation? “Gossip Girl” star Leighton Meester plays the Jennifer Jason Leigh role, I think; Sony wouldn’t screen it, so I’m going entirely by the poster here.

“Sanctum“: FROM EXECUTIVE PRODUCER JAMES CAMERON comes this decidedly one-dimensional survival adventure about trapped cavers. It’s like the “Beneath the 12-Mile Reef” of IMAX 3D adventure movies. Or “The Abyss” without the aliens. Or “The Descent” without the monsters or the psychological acuity. It’s like a lot of things, actually. My review will be online later this afternoon.

“The Time That Remains”: Elia Sulieman’s portmanteau of stories about his family’s life in Palestine — which I reviewed when it played the Toronto Palestine Film Festival last fall — finally scores a commercial release. Susan hits the same notes of “yeah, okay” as I did.

“Turning 32“: Sixteen years after their NFB documentary series “Turning Sixteen”, directors Robbie Hart and Luc Cote catch up to their subjects to see how life has treated them. Not a patch on Michael Apted’s “Up” series, and the decision to produce this as a theatrical feature rather than another TV series makes for a pretty rushed vibe, but it has its moments.

In other big-screeny news, the fifth volume of the Found Footage Festival lands at the Bloor tonight at 9 pm, and we shouldn’t forget “The Robber” and that Chinese remake of “What Women Want“, which opened yesterday. I’ll be seeing the latter this afternoon, and will link to the review when it goes up, because that is what I live to do. UPDATES: Links are live! (For what they’re worth.)