This Is The Story of a Man Named Corleone …

The kiss of death is followed immediately by the eating of brainsI’ve spent most of the weekend going through Paramount’s newly-remastered “Godfather” trilogy, and will be finishing that up today. So I’m a little busy.

Funny story, though: A few years ago, only half-kidding, I tried to cast a remake of the original film with present-day actors.

Think about it: Denis Leary as Sonny; Julianne Moore as Kay. Sofia Coppola, obviously, would play Connie. James Gandolfini as Clemenza. Alec Baldwin would have been a perfect Tom Hagen, though he’s a hair too old for the part now. (UPDATE: Will Arnett can step in, obviously.) Same for David Paymer as Fredo; who do you get now, Ralph Fiennes and Topher Grace?

Vito is a no-brainer; get Robert De Niro, put a little mustache on him, you’re good to go. That just leaves Michael, really … but Al Pacino owned that part from his very first frames. Who could possibly step in now?

At the time, I thought Jason Biggs would be suitably perverse casting. Now I’m thinking maybe we go even further outside the box. Russell Brand, from “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”?

Or if we’re really shooting the works, how about Zachary Quinto from “Heroes”? The guy’s already played Spock, so we know he’s willing to step in to a role indelibly associated with another actor … now we just need to know whether he can play a Sicilian.

5 thoughts on “This Is The Story of a Man Named Corleone …”

  1. Quinto was also Tori Spelling’s gay best friend on So noTORIous. So, like, he’s go that going for him too. You were planning to make this a revisionist remake, weren’t you?

  2. This game is equally fun when you try to come up with the worst possible cast. (And can’t we get Stanley Tucci in there somewhere on the good cast? While I appreciate the comedic Tucci of Devil Wears Prada and Shall We Dance?, I’m remembering how good he was in Big Night when I make the suggestion.)

  3. A bad cast?

    Vito – Jerry Stiller

    Michael – Jorge Garcia (‘Hurley’ on Lost)

    Sonny – Jean Claude Van Damme

    Tom Hagen – David Spade

    Fredo – Vin Diesel

    Kay – Debra Messing

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