It’s finally happened: Somebody got shot in a movie theater for talking.
The weird part? The movie was “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”, a film that wouldn’t necessarily encourage loudmouthery.
Over at Cinematical, Peter Martin takes the long view of the incident, asking pertinent questions like “Who brings a gun to a Cate Blanchett movie?” and making sure we note that the assailant sat back down to finish the film after blasting his cap, while the rest of the audience fled the screening. (I’m just glad he didn’t open up on the other theatergoers for cutting off his view.)
Since the victim wasn’t critically wounded — just shot in the arm — it somehow feels okay to make light of this. And in truth, it’s pretty great that no one was killed, because this is the sort of incident that’s been coming for years.
People aren’t quiet in movies any more. And acceptable theater behavior — talking, texting, taking cell calls — has gone completely out the window since multiplexes have turned into party zones, with the video games and the Burger Kings and the bar service. (And who brings a kid to “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”, anyway? Was “Marley & Me” sold out?)
I’ve shushed more than my share of babblers — usually by shaming them with the same voice I employ to stop dogs from eating my bedding — but I’ve never come even close to getting physical with anyone. Of course, I’m not packing heat, either.
Was it George Carlin or David Cross who came up with the bullet theory of reducing gun violence? (UPDATE: It was Chris Rock; thanks, Mark!) Let everyone have a piece, but make the bullets $10,000 each, so you really have to think through whether someone needs killing.
Ah, that won’t help. People will just club each other with their gun butts. Which would, I’ll freely admit, make “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” a lot more entertaining.