Just you watch: Every studio with an animated release for springtime 2012 is going to schedule it for April. Toons have dominated the box office every weekend this month — “Hop” took the first two, and now “Rio” has held on to the top spot for its second weekend, grossing $26.8 million to fend off “Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Big Happy Family”, which was right behind with $25.8 million.
Placing a distant third with $17.5 million was “Water for Elephants”, demonstrating once again that the undying love of Twi-hards does not a blockbuster make.
Sorry, kids. Better luck with “Breaking Dawn”, huh?
I can’t wait to find out how faithful the movie version of Breaking Dawn will be, in all its idiotic glory.
Will Bella wake up after her wedding night covered with bruises and wonder what SHE did wrong when she sees Edward’s horrified face.
Will Bella’s spine snap during the convulsions she has during labour?
Will Bella stay silent during the agonizing transformation to being a vampire because making a sound would, y’know, make Edward feel bad.
Etc. Enquiring minds want to know. (Glad my daugher was all growed up by the time this self-esteem-sapping tripe came out.)
I think that’s why they broke the film into two parts — the first one can be PG-13 and make lots of money, so the producers are cushioned if the second half really does stick to the book and lands an R rating.
My personal fantasy is that “Breaking Dawn, Parte the Seconde” does get an R rating, forcing parents to accompany their tweenagers to the movie and running face-first into the most depraved aspects of the tripe they’ve been passively supporting all these years. That could make for some awkward conversations on the ride home …